SweetMarzipan’s Weblog
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Cheesed to Meet You


Does anyone happen to know where any of the obnoxious, over-paid airline CEOs live so we can egg their houses? Poopheads.  I won’t say anything else about the matter.  I was just hoping someone else would read the article and be irritated along with me.  I used to like United, too.  It was the only domestic airline I was fond of.  Meh.

Anywho, I’ve had my caffeine and have just finished the tedious project I was assigned this morning I am a relatively cappy hamper at this point.  There’s a Starbucks in my building’s lobby, so I popped down there on my break.

Now I’d like to take a moment to clarify my [all important] opinion of Starbucks [which I have lovingly dubbed, and shall henceforth be referred to in this blog as Starsucks and/or Starschmucks].

Over-roasted. Over-priced. And sorely over-rated.

I only ever go there when I have no other sensible/feasible option.  Starsucks is one of those irritating establisments that general society flocks to like the sheep they are.  (Pardon my callous cynisism here.)  I have a thing about yuppies.  And by “a thing” I simply mean that I don’t like them.  (The only thing worse than a yuppie is a wannabe yuppie.)  Starbucks is the epitome of a yuppie brand name.  Don’t try to deny it.

Ok I don’t hate the establishment of Starbucks, per se; in fact, going in there (assuming there aren’t 8,000,000 other people crammed in the store with me) is usually extremely pleasant.  I don’t know what they pay those people but it’s got to be good cuz they are some of the happiest, friendliest, most fun employees of the service industry that I have ever encountered.  And it doesn’t matter which location you go to–they’re ALL like that!  (Maybe they give them free coffee all day and so they’re all hopped up on caffeine…?  That’d certainly make me happy…) So my hat is off to Starbucks employees everywhere; they are pretty cool…

I just have an issue with any beverage that has more than 3 words in its name.  Iced grande caramel half-calf, skim, no whip chocolate mochaccinolattefrappe–what the hell is wrong with you people?? Is there even any room left in the cup for actual COFFee after you’ve put all that other shit in there??  And don’t you know there’s like, 5000 calories in every sip of that concoction you’re sucking on?  And what’s with the size names? Venti? Grande? Tall?  What ever happened to Small, Medium and Large?  I get the Grande… I get the Tall, even… But mistake me if I’m wrong–doesn’t Venti mean Twenty in Italian?  Is that ounces? Is there some other meaning for the word that my Italian 101 Prof failed to clarify?  Damn, man; just gimme the biggest cup you’ve got back there and fill it with some hot black coffee and a little sugar.  Please.

I almost turned around and back-handed a 13 year old girl in line behind me once for asking her friend what she could get that “doesn’t have any coffee in it.”  First of all; what in God’s name does a 13 year old need to be in Starbucks for anyway?  Second, why bother spending $9 on a Starbucks drink, honey, if it’s not even coffee related?  Go find a drinking fountain, damnit!  Maybe your mum who’s waiting for you outside of the store’s got a Juicy Juice in her purse for you…

I digress.  (It’s not easy to rile me up, but for some reason Starsucks makes the very short list of things that really gets me goin’. ) (No pun intended.)

Don’t even get me started on Dunkin’ Donuts. I’ll save that one for a rainy day…

On to my best friend, Jellybean.

No, her name isn’t actually Jellybean.  It’s not even her real nickname… But we both have dessert-inspired nicknames for each other, and when I asked her whether she preferred I keep her real name private on here she replied with an emphatic “yes”, as I knew she would (she’s got good reasons to do so), and I thought it only appropriate to come up with an equally cute sugary nickname alias.  So Jellybean it is.

This Sunday was Jellybean’s birthday, and as her present I will be making her favourite; home made baked macaroni and cheese from scratch for dinner on Wednesday.  It’ll be a nice little party, too, with her parents and brother and possibly aunt.  (I love JB’s family.)  Hopefully the festivities will make up for her lack of a proper birthday Sunday due to… well… a few obligations that she was less than pleased to have to deal with on her birthday of all days.  I will also be making a Tres Leches cake… her mother’s recipe.  Hopefully it’ll be up to snuff, I’ve never made it before and oh boy what an audience for an inagural attempt… (She’s already offered me pre-emptive forgiveness for it not being as good as her mum’s, bless her.)

I’m excited to make the Mac an’ Cheese, though, cuz it gives me an excuse to visit the new cheese shop in town that I’ve been meaning to get to.

Yay cheese.


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